Persuasive Writing

For the past four weeks 8bh has been revisiting on persuasive writing for Business and Enterprise coming up. Our topic was about morning fitness, we were able to decide if we wanted to be against fitness or with fitness happening in the mornings. I chose to go against fitness because I had many more reasons why we shouldn't and everyone else wanted to be with fitness happening. In the first week we revised what it was, then we planned what who we were writing to and some ideas. We then started writing a introduction and then our ideas, I found this part quite easy because I already had an idea on what I was going to say so I had finished quite quickly. This is my final draft before we send the letters to our receivers

Trisha N

Year 8 Student

Hornby High School

Mr. T Mitchell

Year 7 Teacher & Dean

Hornby High School

Dear Mr Mitchell,

I am Trisha N from 8Bh, a class I think you know quite well. I am writing this letter to you to give my opinion about fitness, this is not to offend you in any way but I do not support fitness happening almost everyday. I am against fitness for a few reasons and concerns but today I am only going to talk about a few reasons that I think matter for everyone.

My first concern is when we come back we start to sweat. As you know when kids start growing they will start to sweat more and our classrooms will start to get stinky, when other students come in it will be more like a stinky kids room instead of a learning environment for kids all ages. Some kids don’t even change into their P.E gear which means kids will be in sweaty, smelly clothes all day. When we all come into class we sometimes come with our shoes on, some of us don’t so that means that people’s socks are dirty and they smell bad as well.

My second concern is everyone's commitment and how they feel afterwards. When we do fitness some students don’t really commit and let everyone else in their team down when they don’t do anything, this results in students having to take punishments for someone who didn’t even do anything to win. When this happens everyone starts to feel tired and start getting angry at one person even if they aren’t doing anything either. After fitness everyone feels lazier and look really flushed, when this happens everyone feels tired and really hot when they come into the classroom, this means that everyone won’t get their work done and just sit there waiting for the bell to ring and to stop doing work. This means that everyone is behind on work or can’t finish their work on time. I know I’ve had to do work at home because in the mornings we haven’t had a lot time to do it and because I feel tired afterwards.

My last concerns are how people could feel sick and take forever to change to the point where they miss fitness and get away with it. A lot of people start to feel sick after fitness for many reasons but don’t tell because they think they might get told off. I feel like this happens because they push their bodies over their limit and end up getting dizzy or want to throw up, this has happened to one of my classmates this year.  When I have been late and have gone to change I always see people changing or waiting for someone to finish changing. When I go to fitness they still don’t come until fitness is about to end, I feel like they are trying to skip doing fitness and no one notices.

I hope that after reading my concerns and reason why I don’t think we should do fitness you understand why I am disagreeing with some people about doing fitness, it’s a great way to exercise in the morning but sometimes it’s not the best. I hope you understand why I have written to you about this and hope that you don’t take these concerns lightly.

If you have any questions or other concerns than you can email me about this

Sincerely,

Trisha N

Class 8Bh